Realizations
by KlainesDarknessChalet
Summary: Darren was always afraid to admit his true feelings. But when he finally found the Courage he decided to do it big. And theres nothing bigger then a sold out tour. CRISSCOLFER


**So...The songs from Darrens tour give me so many feels and these ideas just kept popping into my head.**

**So I decided to write one!**

**Enoy and review!**

**Reviews make me wanna write more stories!**

**Love Ya! *R***

* * *

It was a scary thing; Being on tour.

Showcasing your own songs was the scariest part, but I knew I had to.

I had to show everyone what I was feeling, show a certain person what they mean to me.

And this tour was the best way to do it.

* * *

I made sure to allow video phones into each and every venue.

Knowing the songs would be on youtube before the night was over.

Its what I wanted.

I needed them to be out there so the appeal to actually come to the concert in LA was there.

And it worked.

* * *

The bouncer at the door told Michael of every celebrity or personal friend the attends each concert.

Tonight there were three.

_Curt._

_Mia._

_And Chris._

Well, Chris and Will.

* * *

The first song was over and I was buzzing.

The way the crowd made me feel was electric.

The music was pumping through my veins.

Seven more songs till the two that mean the most.

* * *

"This song is about; if you've ever been with somebody and they end up with somebody new. And you go 'I dunno if he's gunna do any of those things that I did for you.' But, I dunno, its just a song. Its called 'Any of those things.'"

* * *

The music started and I braced myself, this song weren't as meaningful as the next. But the concept was there.

* * *

_"The last time you were mine,_  
_I was just a kid._  
_I didn't know there were consequences for what I did._  
_There were times it was good,_  
_But when it got bad?_  
_I didn't have much pride I gave you everything I had!_

_Cut to today,_  
_I've lived enough to know that love is such a mess. Oh yeah._  
_I have to say..._  
_That seeing you with someone new has got me pretty curious!_

_Is he gunna kiss you in the rain?_  
_Is he gunna cook on sunday?_  
_Is he gunna love you?_  
_No he won't do, any of those things._

_Is he gunna take you when he knows, that its out of his way?_  
_Is he gunna miss you?_  
_No he won't do, any of those things."_

* * *

_Breath. Breath. Breath._

That's all I could tell myself.

* * *

_"Something in me is still with you_  
_Do you feel it too?_  
_So I'm asking, are you in love?_  
_And is this really you?"_

* * *

When that song ended I felt sick knowing what was next.

But I needed to stick to it.

* * *

Out in the audience Mia looked at Darren with a new found pride.

He was singing his feelings.

And she'd never loved him more.

* * *

Curt was on the balcony looking down at his friend.

He knew there was something behind that song, and he had a feeling he knew what it was.

But he weren't one to interfere.

Let fate run its course.

* * *

Chris was on the far left of the crowd, slightly disguised as he didn't want to be given attention.

All the attention should be given to the perfect man on stage.

He felt Will placing his hand in his.

But for some reason it didn't feel as right anymore.

* * *

Will watched on as Chris stared at Darren during the performance.

Yes; you were meant to stare.

But there was staring, and then there was _STARING._

And boy was Chris _STARING_.

He moved his hands from within his pockets and slipped it into his boyfriends.

But there was no grip back.

* * *

As the lights came back up I looked out into the crowd.

Looked for the face I needed.

Looked for the face I loved.

And there it was.

Now all I have to do it sing and hope everything comes across right.

I messed up once by not telling them I loved them.

Well; tonight I think I'll let the world know.

* * *

_"I could write books in my sleep,_  
_Without thinking to deep._  
_I could speak for a hundred days._

_I could explain a concept,_  
_That you didn't get._  
_And do it in one thousand ways. _

_I could write you a poem Shakespeare or Cohen, would have called their own._

_But everything changes now, that you're mine._  
_And all of my words are left, behind._

_Coz no matter how hard I've tried, my tongue is still tied by you."_

* * *

_-_

I looked straight at the face I was singing for.

_This is it._

* * *

Mia gasped in shock as she saw Darren move his gaze.

_This was it._

* * *

Curt followed Darrens eyeline, and when he saw where it landed, he smiled.

_This was it._

* * *

Will looked up from where he was scoffing his shoe against the floor and his jaw went slack.

_This wasn't happening._

* * *

Chris stared up at Darrens form as his sung passionately, eyes closed.

Heart and mind focused on the music he was singing.

Just as the Chorus was about to hit Chris watched Darrens head snap up and his gaze move.

Directly to his own.

_This was for him._

* * *

_"I just wanna tell you I love you!_  
_Its the hardest thing to say!_  
_I turn my head upside down,_  
_Tryna find some kinda way._  
_Just to tell you I need you,_  
_In a way that will be heard._  
_I try to be a poet..._  
_But since I met ya, I've never been good with...words."_

* * *

When the song ended I tore my gaze away from Chris' and looked into the crowd, everything blurry from the tears that were forming in my eyes.

"Thanks for coming out tonight and supporting me. You've been amazing!"

When I got off stage I went straight to the bathroom to splash water on my face.

* * *

The moment I walked out I was attacked in a hug.

"I'm so so so so sooo proud of you! When you said you were gunna do it I didn't think you would!"

"Thanks." I told Mia truthfully.

Just then some photographers come round the corner asking us for a picture.

We complied.

We were best friends, even if people thought more.

Just as the camera flashed I had looked to my left, just passed Mia and saw Chris approaching, with what looked like a tear streaked face.

"That's all now boys, come back later for more yeah?" I smiled.

"Sure thing man."

I gave Mia one last hug and she wished me luck.

_It was all or nothing._

* * *

As soon as Darren finished 'Words' and announced a break, Chris realized he was barely breathing.

That song was for him.

Darren loves him?

Yes, Darren loves **HIM.**

He turned around and saw Will staring at him with what looked like understanding.

He removed his hand from Will grip and whispered...

"I_ can't_ do this, i-im so sorry."

Will just tilted his head and stared at him.

"Its always been him hasn't it? The guy you couldn't get over? The guy you still love?"

All Chris could do was nod as the tears began leaking from his eyes.

"I told him I l-loved him once, but he said he didn't know. That he was scared. I guess I understand how he felt." Chris said, staring towards the backstage entrance.

"Just go. Go get him and be happy."

That's all Will said before he turned and left.

_This was it._

* * *

Soon enough it was just me and Chris in the narrow hallway.

Just staring at eachother.

"I-"  
"You-"

We said at the same time, both cracking a smile at it.

"You first." I said, gesturing with my hand.

"You were amazing out there, your songs moved me. So meaningful."

I looked to the ground and blushed ever so slightly.

Its one thing for fans to love your songs, but then again they'd probably love it if I sung the phonebook.

But to have Chris say that to me with such honest eyes, meant the world.

"Thank you. So much. You don't know what it means to have to say that."  
I replied truthfully.

"So '_Words_'?" Chris prompted.

"Yes, _'Words_'."

"For me?"

"For you."

"Why now?" Chris asked, moving closer.

"Because as it said; _'Everything changes now that you're mine._" I sung quietly.

"But when you dumped me it changed aswell, it changed back to the glum life I knew of before you. I realized I needed you, and no matter what insecurities I had, I- I shouldn't let that get in the way.

Of course I love you!" I practically screeched.

" I've always loved you! From the day I pretty much met you I knew you were it. I'm sorry I didn't realize it soon-"

And my rant was cut off.

By lips so familiar, by lips I loved.

As we pulled apart I rested my forehead on Chris' and looked deep into those ocean blue eyes I loved more than anything.

"I will always love you." I whispered between us.

"And I'll always love you." He said back, with a small smile.

Just then something popped into my head.

"Oh no, but what about-"

"He knows. He understands. He knew I didn't love him. He knew it was more of a rebound. Everythings fine."

I let out the breath I was holding at Chris' words and let another smile grace my face.

* * *

Outside the crowd was screaming.

**"ENCORE! ENCORE! WE WANT MORE!"**

* * *

"I have to go back out you know?" I said with a sigh.

"I know. Now go and do your_ boyfriend_ proud."

"Boyfriend?" I questioned.

"Boyfriend."

And with one last kiss we parted and I went back on stage.

* * *

_Sold out tour._

_Amazing friends._

_Worlds greatest boyfriend._

_Yeah, my life was pretty great._

* * *

"Okay guys settle down. Two more songs." The screams continued.

"I think we should take it back to the song that began a new chapter to my life. A song that changed_ everything_."

I looked over towards my boyfriend and smiled.

_"You think I'm pretty, without any make-up on."_


End file.
